War Groupies
Johnson: “Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier, or not having been at sea.”
Boswell: “Lord Mansfield does not.”
Johnson: “Sir, if Lord Mansfield were in a company of General Officers and Admirals who have been in service, he would shrink; he’d wish to creep under the table.”
Boswell: “”No; he’d think he could try them all.”
Johnson: “Yes, if he could catch them: but they’d try him much sooner. No, Sir; were Socrates and Charles the Twelfth of Sweden both present in any company, and Socrates to say, ‘Follow me, and hear a lecture on philosophy;’ and Charles, laying his hand on his sword, to say, ‘Follow me, and dethrone the Czar;’ a man would be ashamed to follow Socrates. Sir, the impression is universal; yet it is strange. As to the sailor, when you look down from the quarter deck to the space below, you see the utmost extremity of human misery; such crouding, such filth, such stench!”
Boswell: “Yet sailors are happy.”
Johnson: “They are happy as brutes are happy, with a piece of fresh meat, –with the grossest sensuality. But, Sir, the profession of soldiers and sailors has the dignity of danger. Mankind reverence those who have got over fear, which is so general a weakness.”
Scott: “But is not courage mechanical, and to be acquired?”
Johnson: “Why yes, Sir, in a collective sense. Soldiers consider themselves only as parts of a great machine.”
Scott: “We find people fond of being sailors.”
Johnson: “I cannot account for that, any more than I can account for other strange perversions of imagination.
War groupies are usually third tier professional writers who, for whatever reason, have decided to make military history their forte. They generally are not combat veterans-their combat experience runs to listening to grandpa’s stories of what it was like at St. Mihiel, or whatever. They write books by recycling the books of other war groupies, interviewing vets involved in the topical events, reading a couple of autobiographies written by the generals involved on both sides, collecting some black and white archival photos then gluing the whole dog’s breakfast together with some eighth grade-level prose. Bam, you’ve got yourself a 250 page book on WW2 US Army Air Force Combat Air Support, or the 75th Ranger Regiment’s jump into Panama, or whatever. Think “book version of a History Channel special,” and you won’t be far off. In fact, the History Channel’s roots are in this genre, as best as I can tell.
“Who cares, B?” you might say. “Different strokes for different folks, poorly written military history, Furries, horses, whatever floats your boat. What, are you going to shine the Batsignal at the sky every time some journalism major from Temple University publishes a poorly written book on the 781s Combat Furniture Repair Squadron’s last stand at the Meuse? Why does it matter?” It matters because we live in a democracy with a volunteer military. Most Americans have never seen service. Most of those who have served have never seen combat. As WW2 and Vietnam fade into the past, more and more citizens make it through life without knowing a single combat veteran. Human nature being what it is, most men are naturally curious about war, and speculate on it more than almost any other subject of which they have no experience. Every little boy plays at war, and the fascination doesn’t disappear with age. War groupies exploit this for petty financial gain by feeding into the fantasies of combat virgins. In their retelling, the storm of random misery, senseless suffering, incompetence, incoherence, bullshit, and occasional heroism that makes up war gets streamlined into a comic book story.
On a personal level, dealing with the aftermath is a profoundly alienating experience for a combat veteran. Trying to find common ground with someone who hasn’t served over fishing, video games, women or sports is infinitely preferable to having them try to connect with you over war as it appears in their imagination. The question that comes up over and over again, and generally brings a meaningful conversation to a halt when it does, is “have you ever killed someone?” A moment’s thought should tell the person asking the question that it’s about as appropriate as asking an acquaintance about his wife’s sexual preferences. Combat is filled with moments of intimacy with the great mysteries of life and death, and to discuss these moments inappropriately is to profane them. The only book I’ve every read that comes close to expressing the nature of the experience is Matterhorn, by Karl Marlantes. When these moments are commodified and sold by war groupies to combat virgins, it cheapens the veteran’s experience and leaves the virgin more ignorant than before. You are better off knowing that you know nothing than having false knowledge.
Comments | 
damn good thread ! Thanks B ! Look forward to E2 and K2 posts soon!
Perhaps you may have forgotten that Socrates was also a combat soldier.
Your journey to a broader perspective begins when you dig into the minds of these war groupies of combat virgins. Kinda like watching a NASCAR race where the fans in your area are going nuts every time a certain driver whizzes by as you wonder what is so special about turning left, then turning left again, then…
It’s not about them, it about the “truths” you experienced and what you intend to do about sharing such realities to others for the “good” that exists in such evil doings.
War has always been good and evil, life and death struggling for supremacy. Become the wise teacher if such energies exist within you.
Fear has many faces…
I am very well aware of Socrates’ background.
Most of the really good stuff that came from Socrates came to us via his soldierly disciple, Xenophon. His combat virgin disciple, Plato, generated and passed on a lot of the creepy 1984-type utopian stuff that keeps coming up in Western history.
The minds of combat groupies and virgins are no mystery-I used to be the latter, reading the former.
I grew up knowing my dad fought in WWII (Pacific), but nothing else. When I came home from Desert Storm, we sat on the deck in a warm, humid May afternoon, drinking coffee while watching the thunderheads building over the Flint Hills. Dad started telling war stories. I asked him why he was talking to me about that after all those years (I was 35 then). He looked at me for a second and said “You’ve been there. Now you can understand.” He has never had a similar conversation with my brother. Dad is 90 now, and has forgotten a lot due to dementia. But he still remembers his war years. Some things stick, for good or ill.
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say, ‘These wounds I had on Crispin’s day.’
Old men forget: yet all shall be forgot,
But he’ll remember with advantages
What feats he did that day.
Being honest, I have to say that my wars were adventures. I’m not being macho. Adventures are dark, uncomfortable things while you are living them. It’s only afterwards that they reveal their charms.
I remember several times in Afghanistan when I said to myself and guys on my team it’s too bad this has to end. After all, I was in a foreign country with a lot of history, experiencing new things; did not have to worry about keeping up the house, mowing the lawn, paying bills, going to my civilian job. I was never in a rut. That year seemed to go by slowly, but I did not mind, because every day was new and hard edged. Every day was significant; I could not just skate thru the year going about my boring routine.
My friends and neighbors may think I’m a bit crazy for looking back fondly on a situation most of them pray they will never know. So now, back in Kansas, I’ve gone, like the Wizard of Oz, from black and white, to full color, and back to black and white. Fortunately, I live near Fort Riley, and have among my friends combat vets from WWII through the present wars. I’m not alone in my experience, an object of curiosity and perhaps fear. But at least most of them no longer ask did you kill anyone.
Thanks, B. Good post. Merry Christmas to you, Tim, and all the Free Rangers.
Great comment Ron. Great post too Tim.
woops – good post ‘B’ ..
I remember several times in Afghanistan when I said to myself and guys on my team it’s too bad this has to end.
Spot on.
After telling some of my war virgin friends back home some war stories, triple amputees etc, they said, “Wow, I can’t believe that stuff is happening”.
WTF do you think is happening?!
B, great thread but in the last paragraph, you lament the fact that OIF and OEF were run by civilians (combat virgins) based on ideas put in their heads by war groupies. I get the sense that you think OIF and OEF were/are poorly run, and having been there I would agree that in the end, the expected results will not be achieved. From my perspective, Afghanistan will have been a waste of blood and treasure. But that being said, what is the solution?
1. Old man was a WWII vet, went to his grave without discussing his experiences.
2. Lots of our neighbors were, too -and considerably more talkative.
3. The gist of their conversation was that, no matter what, you had to be there to understand.
4. Forty years later, still haven’t got my own experiences sorted out.
5. Know a lot more now about what I did and what was going on than I did, at the time.
6. Studied up on it, during a subsequent tour of active duty. Am bored with the subject at this remove.
7. The best work on the subject was and is LtCol Michael Lee Lannings “The Only War We Had.” The author’s terminology and experiences were ones I recognized. Works for me but not necessarily anyone else.
8. That volume was autobiographical. Lanning went on to write a bunch of other stuff that you would probably class as War Porn.
9. Anyway, when folks ask me what Vietnam was like, I recommend Lanning’s book -and have given a bunch of copies away.
10. Couldn’t relate to the Hon Sen Webb’s book: “Fields of Fire.” Bought “Matterhorn” and haven’t gotten around to reading it. Am sure it’s worthy enough, but….
11. Boy are you right about changes -and you ain’t seen nothing yet.
12. Can see myself in the young Marines and soldiers I talk to -except, to a man, they are more committed and professional than I ever was.
13. A couple million of us rotated through that damn place, and most of us dealt with the aftermath well enough. If that hadn’t messed me up, some other stupid thing I did would have.
14. Vietnam was so unpopular, most of us alums hid the fact. Went through three years of college without bringing the subject up. Was not popular with the ladies: mouthed a tepid anti-war line in the interest of getting laid.
15. Anyway, someday will get it all sorted out -or not.
V/R JWest
I’m a bit upset FRI has come to sort of an end. I could really identify with a lot of the posts while I was up in Kabul under much less restriction. Now I’ve got a BS job in KAF and never get to see anything.
The important thing to know is that A-stan is a real place with real people living in it. They essentially want the same things as we do at home. Stability and a brighter future for their children.. Sadly, the solutions to these problems aren’t likely to come from external players.
You’re right that many of the veterans accounts are poorly written. But they’re not writers, they don’t know how to turn a phrase, capture the reader –and so many of their books sit in the trunk of their car gathering dust, self published with nary a buyer.
As for the war groupies, it would be nice if you were to name names. Which writers or books are you taking issue with? Because in all honesty, the accounting of any large event often falls to the person who can assimilate all the information, package it into a readable and understandable form –and what we have to hope is that it is accurate, and true. We also hope the writer is in it for the good of the people whom he or she is portraying.
This is why a lot of us squirm when Hollywood delivers another war movie. The screenwriter who walked away with the Oscar for Hurt Locker went over without any experience as either a soldier or war journalist only once. Then he came back and wrote a script. The Director got her kudos for making a “guys” movie, but was it really that? Or was it really just another Hollywood product with a predicable protagonist with a mountain to climb? It pissed off a lot of people who had been over there, and true to form -the machine that is Hollywood moved on to other pastures once the loot had been gained from the little gold man. Still, there is a point that even the most ardent milblogger has argued: sometimes in order to get the masses out of the mall, you have to give them some pre-packaged goods. I don’t agree. But I see their point.
Once in awhile, though, you do get a good writer –and while you may call him or her a war groupie, I would have to say that their efforts have been meticulously and honorably rendered. Names? I’ll name two whom I never saw anything but the best of intention and putting their own lives on the line: Sebastian Junger and Tim Hetherington. They were (and are in the case of Seb) nothing but dogged, meticulous and committed to the long term well being of both those who served, and civilians who have suffered the consequences of war (Tim’s work for Liberians).
I’m going to sit this one out, because in spite of volunteering three times over three decades my nation still doesn’t need me (4F) in uniform. If it does, then we’re a lot worse off then anybody suspects or has ever written about.
Echoing Kanani’s point somewhat with just one more name…
Sir John Keegan.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Keegan
ANOTHER
PERFECT
DAY,
R
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But not objective….Why?
Lot of people don’t join the army. They don’t take a hateful occupation and get paid for killing people in foreign countries they got no business in…
WHY DID YOU JOIN THE ARMY….?
Because YOU were the virgin and the war groupie. You critisise your own faults in other people (thats basic psychology)
If you want to know who the fool is….the virgin and the groupie…
LOOK IN THE MIRROR.